


is it hot in here or is it just me?

by soulas



Series: tumblr smols [3]
Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Buzzfeed: Worth It (Web Series)
Genre: College AU, M/M, i hope you like temperature puns, it's like that porno where the repairman is only there to rip you a new one, pwp aka plot without porn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-04 17:59:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15846456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soulas/pseuds/soulas
Summary: Thanks global warming.





	is it hot in here or is it just me?

It’s really hot in their apartment. Like. Really goddamn hot.

“I think...the AC is broken…” Andrew mutters. The heat is making his brain slow and dumb and he’s really trying not to think about how gross he feels lying on their shitty couch in his underwear with every window open and every fan desperately pushing the hot air around and around their apartment.

“You think?” Shane groans. “It’s approximately one shit million degrees right now. I think I’m actually melting.”

“Ok, i’m calling someone,” Andrew says decidedly. “This is ridiculous.”

And that’s how Andrew is woken up at 9 am on a Wednesday morning by their annoyingly tinny doorbell. He has night classes and then works at a 24/7 Starbucks till 3 am, so he’s not really that conscious when he stumbles out of his room.  _If Shane forgot his keys again, swear to god, I’m going to find a new roommate_ , he thinks to himself blearily.

“Hi! Good morning!”

Andrew squints at the man dressed head to toe in heavy blue coveralls. “Who are you?”

The man raises an eyebrow. “Uh, I’m here to fix the air conditioning unit? I’m Steven.” He takes a piece of paper out of his breast pocket and frowns at it. “This is apartment 24A, right?”

“Oh. Oh yeah, sorry about that.” Andrew rubs his eyes and turns to let Steven in. “I’m Andrew. Sorry, I just woke up and…”

“Oh no it’s fine! Just let me know where the problem is and I’ll be out of here soon.”

Andrew points Steven to the AC unit and since he’s up already, starts looking through their cupboards looking for food. he ends up with a combination of a slightly overripe banana, stale lucky charms, and Oreos. (The Oreos are Shane’s. They really need to hit up the grocery store soon.)

“Dang,” a voice comes from the stairs’ closet. “This unit is really overheated.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Andrew calls back through a mouthful of Oreos. 

“That depends,” Steven says, walking into the kitchen. “On how much you want to spend on it.”

Andrew swears he doesn’t choke, it’s the Oreos, they’re dry as fuck and he didn’t have any milk. Steven looks mildly alarmed.

“Are you…ok?”

Andrew wheezes and does that wave thing that says  _I’m fine_  and turns to get a drink of water.  _Holy shit,_ he thinks. Well it must have been pretty goddamn hot in that closet because Steven had apparently decided to unzip the top of his uniform and tie it around his waist and no, he was not wearing an undershirt. He’s also really fucking hot, and not the kind of hot that’s currently invading their apartment. This has got to be a fucking joke. 

Andrew gulps down the water and takes a breath. He is an adult. He can behave like a fucking adult in this goddamn weird situation. “So, uh, do we get a new unit? Do we have to pay for a whole new setup?”

“Nah,” Steven says, wiping his hands on his pants. “I just need to replace some parts. but it will cost a little more. If you’re cool with that?”

“Yeah,” Andrew manages to say. “Yeah, that sounds great. Thanks.”

“Sweet!” Steven says, smiling widely. “I’ll be back in a couple of days around the same time? I'll give you a call before.”

“Uh, yeah. great.” 

Steven shows up in three days and reinstalls their updated AC unit. It’s still hot as fuck in their apartment, and somewhere along the way, Steven loses his shirt again. Andrew spends most of the day eating ice straight from the freezer and trying to maintain eye contact like a normal human being.

And then well, their shower head is doing this weird thing where the water spits itself out sporadically. and that’s a whole other level, with Steven finally emerging from the shower soaked, but triumphant. And then their dishwasher is running slow. And their fire alarm isn’t blinking like it should.

Shane calls an emergency meeting at this point. 

“Listen.” Shane looks right into Andrew’s eyes. “Either fuck him or don’t. Stop calling him to fix our shitty apartment. I don’t have the income for this.”

Andrew starts to protest but Shane holds up a hand and points at Andrew. “Fuck him or chuck him, Ilnyckyj.”

“That’s terrible,” Andrew says. “Never say that again.” But, okay, maybe Shane has a point. 

He thinks about it all day and messes up more orders than he ever has on his shift. So much so that his manager sends him home early. It’s 12 am and he’s sits on his bed fiddling with his phone for about five minutes before opening up his text conversation with Steven.

** Hey, are you free tomorrow afternoon? **

** yeah! :) is there something else broken lol **

(Andrew’s hands are a little sweaty and he feels weak and pathetic like a sad high schooler asking their first crush to prom. This is all Shane’s fault.)

_I was wondering_ \- no, that sounded too uncertain.  _Would you like to_ \- no, too formal. 

** Do you want to grab coffee?  **

He hits send quickly before he loses his nerve and immediately regrets it. Do you want to grab coffee? What kind of vague wishy-washy crap is that?

He throws his phone across the bed. _I’ll wait ten minutes and if he hasn’t responded, then i’m going to move_ , Andrew decides. Hide his face forever. Never reenter society. Wallow in his embarrassment for-

His phone screen flashes.

He doesn’t leap at his phone, okay. He’s a little more dignified than that (Not by that much more, mind you.)

** i’d love that! :) :) (just to clarify, is this a date kind of thing or a thanks for fixing my stuff kind of thing?)  **

Andrew smiles despite himself.

** Definitely a date kind of thing. **

Shane is way too smug about it

“Hey, hey,” he tells them constantly. “I get to be the best man at the wedding, okay? Since I basically singlehandedly orchestrated this.”

Andrew gets his revenge when Ryan Bergara shows up.

 

_ Bonus: _

Okay but this time it was Shane’s fault. He’s the one throwing crazy parties that end up with part of their wall bashed in and when Andrew wakes up there’s a strange man in one of those douchey white tank tops in his living room.

Andrew looks around. “Uh, Steven…?”

Steven pops his head in. “Oh, morning, baby,” he says, walking over to give him a quick kiss. “This is Ryan, he’s helping me with the paint job.”

And Steven is toned but this guy. Andrew’s pretty sure he’s seen pro-wrestlers less ripped than this guy.

“Hi!” Ryan says with a big smile, extending a hand and gripping Andrew’s firmly. “Don’t worry we should fix this right up. It should be done, oh, an hour?”

Andrew flexes his hand. “Cool, yeah. Thanks.” Ryan smiles again (god, those teeth are blinding) and proceeds to pick up two fucking giant cans of paint and stroll unperturbed out of the room.

Andrew slumps down onto the couch next to Shane, who’s been suspiciously quiet and is clutching a pillow to his chest.

“Oh my god,” Andrew says quietly. “There’s two of them. Shane. There’s two of them. Shane. Shane?”

Shane lets out a small wheeze but is pretty much unresponsive for a good hour. 

“Shane. You’re scaring me.”

 

“At least close your mouth, man. God.”

 

“So I guess you’d be down for fixing our fridge now, huh?

“Shut the fuck up, Andrew.”

**Author's Note:**

> [tumblr](https://keyolove.tumblr.com/)


End file.
